I know you'll be shocked, but someone has to tell you. I didn't win the 2011 Carrera GTS in the Porsche Club of America raffle. I know your hurting for me, and I appreciate it.
I don’t think I can eat breakfast. I’m not going to brush my teeth either, nor comb my hair. I want that PCA raffle judges to see what they’ve done to me. I’m a shell of a man. How could they lead me on like that? Mailing me raffle flyers, posting pictures on their website. They should be ashamed of themselves. This is no different than all those girls in college that gave me their number only to tell me they were busy once I called. My new Porsche driving gloves are going to look pretty stupid when I’m behind the wheel of a Ford Explorer.
So now what? I can tell you I’m not going to buy a new GTS that’s for sure. Besides, I’m not sure Porsche corporate wasn’t also complicit in preventing my win. Oh, did I mention that I don’t even like water-cooled Carreras anyway. Well, I don’t.
After watching the video, I forgive Colin Black for winning my car. Frankly, I cried like a baby for him. Enjoy! You lucky bastard.